New house (perfection)

New friends (and the old ones)

New Jeep (also perfection)

New cat (Nemo has a new friend)

And all is well.

Dave is playing bass (yay)

I am making art (of many many kinds)

We have a lot of ideas about the future.

We want to tour with Brian and Katie Ernst (in a little airstream trailer)

We want to move to Peru (someday)

We want to visit my Aunts and Uncles and Brother and his girlfriend in PA

We want to love each other forever (in progress)

We want to adopt kids (like a million of them)

We want to go to Africa (also with Brian and Katie)

We want to make music and make art (forever)

Consider yourselves updated!

…I quit my full time job
…I committed to doing 20+ hours a week of service for Christ Community Church
…I lived with people that I didn’t pick myself
…I learned how to love.

Looking back I am confident that if I chose to not do the Apprenticeship… I would not be married to Emily today, I would never have gotten to tour professionally as a musician, and I would never have been invited to Florida to be a part of Five and Two. How wonderful it is to look in your rear-view mirror and see a divine appointment every step of the way. My life is truly blessed.

Five and Two is starting an apprenticeship program… WHAT?  … (that’s crazy talk).  Yes, Five and Two Apprenticeship will begin Aug 23.  How cool is that?  I would never have imagined I would be a part of creating an apprenticeship program here in Tampa. Emily and I have both individually participated in a similar apprenticeship program in Colorado… and we are using that experience to shape what Five and Two Apprenticeship will look like.

Our Core Values:

…Humanize the needy through food
…Allow development by God beyond the edge of the personal and the community
…Develop kingdom leaders with missional habits
…Intense focus on personal spiritual formation
…Relational/Community based
…Action/Reflection learning
…Push toward your calling/leadership
…Develop “next step”

Our desire is to challenge people to live a missional lifestyle, thinking outside of themselves… while equipping them with the necessary resources to do so. Emily and I will be living in a house with 4-6 other individuals. We will share our struggles, hopes, fears, weaknesses… ultimately our life with others… and they with us.  It will be a challenging time (for both the applicants and Emily and I) … but I am confident God will bless our commitment to giving of ourselves.  It is both an exciting time, and a scary time… but there is no better place to be in life.

Everyday I am more and more impressed with Emily… Her ability to love with no limits is supernatural. Being able to see people changed as a result of God using the love she is able to give is awe-inspiring. What a journey we are taking, what an opportunity to be the change we want to see in the world… rather than just talking about it.

I can’t wait to look back in another 3 years… Here we go… It’s Apprenticeship 2.0 time…

It’s 4:54 am. Technically I have yoga class in the morning, but I don’t thing I’ll make it…I might still go, because I love yoga a lot, but I think my body will die in a horrid-stretchy-zen death if I do. At the very least I simply will never rise out of savasana until hours have gone by and ladies from the evening kickboxing class step on my head.

I forgot to go to sleep last night…or rather, I just never went to sleep. I got home from work at 9:30 and, upon checking the mail and tearing open my new set of art markers that arrived, sat down to diligently continue my new drawing project (to be unveiled as soon as I finish 300 drawings–so far I have 48). I’m actually still not tired. If I were to be in a constant state of art-creating, I think I could go without rest for days. I worked for 14 hours straight on a drawing start to finish once (the night before it was due; PS – I got an A) and still had energy to go to all my classes the next day. Art is like sleep or food. Although, it might be more like food that is laced with something fishy, because I feel kind of crazy right now, as if thousands of tiny Emilys are standing on the outside of my stomach and waddling like penguins and making my innards wiggle. And my eyes hurt a lot and feel really huge. And legs and left arm feel tingly from not moving for so long. Anyway, life is good and I am making some really awesome things with my hands, and I am excited to draw 252 more drawings!

Let me preface this by saying … I LOVE to learn new things and I love experiencing a different facet of life… typically this is designed by accomplishing life with new people.  But is adding another coin in my how-much-i-know piggy bank of my ultimate goal?

Knowledge can trip you up… throw salt in your game… knock you out at the knees … if you let it.  If knowledge is your prize, your cheese at the end of the maze, you very well could be missing life.

Live with reckless abandon… Don’t get caught up in analyzing every move you make, or why you do it.  Share your life, wisdom, and talents freely.  Stop hoarding your gifts and talents.  Do something for free, when it doesn’t make sense…

Remember a time when you were a child … before you started attaching dollar amounts to things.  A time when maybe you had less knowledge

This might take the cake for my most discombobulated post yet… I am not gifted in writing…

Culturally this church is much different than what I grew up with (I believe the same goes for Emily)… and we’ve already connected and met great people… but i digress.

Our pastor (Ron Simmons) uses different vocabulary sometimes than i’m used to hearing.  Not only does this make for great conversations with him… but I actually pay attention during his sermons.  One such sermon he said “… you are a hot mess!”

I was perplexed.  Who would’ve thought to put hot and mess together?  It still seems a bit ludicrous to me… but it works.

You, me, all of us… are a hot mess.  We are broken and dirty… You are no better than the homeless guy panhandling … I am no better than the serial killer on death row.  Once we get THAT into our heads we can find restoration.

So I encourage you… When a friend has let you down, disappointed you… Give them a hug and tell them its ok, we all will let each other down sometime.  When your significant other is just irritating you to no end… remember that you are a bear to live with, and just as irritating sometimes.  And the next time you see a homeless person asking for money… Don’t avoid their gaze or pretend they don’t exist… But look them kindly in the eyes and tell them it will get better… things will change.

When we begin to see others with compassion change happens.  We are all in this together… all in a hot mess.

Dave grew a bit since I last posted.

FIVE AND TWO HAS A WEBSITE!!! This is excellent news because I was recently talking to a friend from Greeley and she asked “so how is Dave’s work with the homeless going?” and I realized that most people have no idea what we are doing (largely due to the fact that it was only in the last month or so that we knew what we were doing). The website is also full of random pictures of Dave, so go check it out! Five and Two has been busy adding more food pantries, picking fresh citrus and other produce, planting new gardens, equipping other food ministries, distributing to a wider demographic, and generally feeding a lot more people (including People, a hungry chihuahua living with his owner on the streets).

About three weeks ago I started working part-time at a local health food store called Nutrition S’Mart (catchy, yah?) and it is a blast! There are a lot of regular characters who roll through–the woman who buys tons of  gluten-free snacks every saturday, the man who travels the world and brings cool foreign bills back as gifts for the cashiers, the drunk who stumbles in right before closing every night to buy a gallon of water. Time flies by; the end of my shift always sneaks up on me. My coworkers are all chill people, and the store just has a positive, happy vibe going on.

I have been doing a ton of painting/sewing/crafting/knitting/sculpting/general creating. It must be infectious–Dave is even in on it, picking up the crocheting hook and cranking out a few granny squares a night! We definitely spur each other on, and he is really good at encouraging me to keep going when I hit a creative lull. He has been recording music like crazy, experimenting with different sounds and learning how to construct songs in new ways.

A friend of ours recently hooked us up with his old Nikon DSLR which has totally changed my ability to document everything. You may have noticed a sudden increase in quality and quantity of my photos on facebook.

We found Designer’s Way, our church we attend on Thursdays. Dave plays his bass, I play with children, and when I sing my loudest I can barely hear my voice (which I like)! D’Way has renewed my love for many repeated-into-meanginglessness worship songs. The pastor says what needs to be said, no less. Hugs replace the ubiquitous “good morning,” avoid eye-contact handshakes I always dreaded. Everyone welcomed us in genuinely and wholly. I did not think it was possible to find somewhere as filling, communal, and challenging as Unearthed (our church in Greeley), but here it is, newly started in Tampa, only months before our arrival. I wish you could all come check it out. I just can’t describe it. Not only are we being pushed and changed spiritually, but Dave is learning new things on the bass, too! The music is really different (both culturally and in difficulty) from what we are used to hearing, and Dave finds he actually has to

rehearse (a first for him).

Whew! So there is a semi-brief summary of major new things. Life is good. On to something else.

I have been a disciplined and consistent journalizer since the dawn of my handwriting (age 7: “I wus mad at mom, she sead I had to go to my room. Luke seemd like my best frend. I was dansing”) but for the past few months I haven’t been writing. The habit is still here–I carry my journal with me everywhere and occasionally pull it out to scribble down an insect drawing and a line or two of thought–but mostly it stays tucked between my wallet and a spare shopping bag in my purse. Entries became factual rather than reflective. I have been trying to get back into the swing of it, but…I don’t think I need it any more, not in the way it was to me. I write at length when I’m upset, and I create for hours when I’m overjoyed–the decline of one gives rise to the other. I will return to journalling of course, but I hope that after this drought that penning my thoughts will resurge as an expression of happiness and work in conjunction with my art works.

Hmm…guess that’s all for now! I’m kind of too lazy to write a good conclusion paragraph.

A little sunset present on our beach day

My mom told me a story once about the brass bed she and my dad slept in for most of my life ( the bed was replaced with an IKEA model recently). Mom always wanted a brass bed, and she prayed daily to find one. During a garage sale hunt, she spotted a black bed frame. The sellers confirmed to her that it was a very tarnished and dirty old brass bed, and it had already been sold and was waiting for pickup. My mom left her phone number, asking that they call her if for some reason the man who bought it backed out. Her phone rang the next day. Mom returned to take the bed (I think she paid $20 for it), spent days scrubbing and polishing, and slept on a boxspring in the brass frame until a mattress came along. She told this story as an example of God providing for us and answering prayers. I usually rolled my eyes, because seriously, brass is soooo out of style, and who asks for a bed? Everyone has beds (I was not aware of people outside the upper-middle-class when I was a teenager).

Now that I have personally experienced a constant outpouring of provision in my and Dave’s life, I love that story. I have countless tales like it myself now–how we found our couch for $25, how our bed was a sort of miracle gift, how after selling our beloved piano another one dropped into our laps. Two trips to Peru. A free honeymoon getaway. A cheap bike from a friend. Free bookshelves. Garage sale dining room. I have painted six and a half paintings since moving here, and I have yet to spend a dime on supplies since a stranger gave me his old paints. Each of the large (and most of the small) things we own was provided for us in a surprising way, usually just when we needed it. That kind of sums up most of our experience in Florida so far I think–trusting God for all things; him providing what we need and excess to spread around.

All those in favor of 12 more hours of birthday?

enjoying a walk in the bay after a day of thrifting

Our very amazing and close friends Heather and Andrea came to visit for a few days last week. It was incredible! Four days filled with sangria, hookah, and great conversation. I have seen people I love since moving here–Jake, Brian, Linden and Tim in LA and my family over Christmas in Massachusetts–but none in my new environment. I wasn’t sure what to expect. Sometimes it’s strange to see old friends after a period of being apart, but it was just so natural for them to be in Florida with us.

I think there had been a disconnect  in my brain between Florida and everywhere else, almost as if we were in an impenetrable bubble. We could leave and see friends and be in a close community, but that isn’t in Florida for us yet. I went to LA to see friends and had to leave and return; same with my family in Boston. I talk to Linden daily and send letters to a few friends every month or so, but none of them are here. Andrea and Heather came to us, physical, present; somehow that was different to me, and it seemed to reconnect life now with life before, joining it all together in a wonderful joy ball. It’s like I was in a Tampa daze and snapped back to reality.

Some things we did (that you can come do with us too): manatee viewing, space shuttle launching, seafood eating, sangria drinking, cigar and hookah smoking, beach combing, hair dying, prison tattooing, music making, theology pondering, water splashing, thrift storing, adventure having, Sweedish shopping, puppies petting, dangerous driving, Cuban eating. Escape the snow and come visit!

PS-If you live somewhere with a lot of snow right now, I’m sorry.

Today… it is not my routine.  And that is why I believe I can appreciate it in a different way.

Why does music touch people in ways people cannot describe with words?  Why does the movement of air molecules in a rhythmic pattern, pushing through the air… hitting your eardrum (forcing it to move) brushing over the cilia in your ear … sending synapses through your brain cause an emotional response … cause your soul to be touched?  Music is intimate… Some would even say that a musician, sitting in front of you touches you with the vibrations that he makes… he touches your eardrum… That’s intimate right?

I love how music can cross language barriers… religious barriers … and bring people together in ways words cannot…

I’m sure everyone has a song/tape/cd that they listened to while dealing with a breakup.  A song that you danced to at your wedding? Maybe a song from a funeral? …

How has music impacted you in ways that you will remember forever?  I’d be curious to hear…